Parents looking for ways to help a struggling young teen girl can learn about how we address Power and Control issues at our year-round, all-girls boarding school near Austin, TX.
River View Christian Academy understands that parents want to send a young girl to a safe, monitored environment where she receives personal care, and individual support that help heal emotional and mental disorders–whether brought on by trauma, foster care, adoption or family genetics.
And while your young teen girl enrolls our year-round boarding school for improving her academic/life skills, River View Christian Academy also helps girl students struggling with power and control issues improve their mental and physical health.
Power and Control?
“Children who struggle with power and control issues manifest this struggle in a variety of ways. Here are just a few:” 1
Ignoring a direct instruction or command
Completing tasks half-way
Using the “silent treatment”
Pushing a limit (for example: child is told to stop throwing the ball in the house, throws it one more time and then stops)
Refusing to eat what is placed before him
Lashing out with anger when reprimanded
Refusing to apologize
“A child with power and control issues only feels worthwhile when he is dominating those around him. He achieves this domination by getting adults to do what he wants or by only doing what he wants to do. He is likely experiencing deep-seated insecurities which are masked by these power plays.” 1
Another therapist shares, “In my experience, this behavior came about for one or more of these reasons: “
1) Kids with underdeveloped lower centers of the brain often experience a lot of failure when others are leading. That’s because those in control usually have no awareness of how to build into the structure (i.e. make subtle modifications) so that such kids can then easily comply and experience success.
So to avoid that dreaded sense of failure, some kids compensate by seizing control of the situation. They’ll insist on doing it “their way.” But their way also works best for their brain, and now makes it impossible to fail by not doing a task as others expect.
2) Kids take control because others (inadvertently) reinforce this distorted sense of power by giving a lot of attention to the negative behavior. Here, the child’s brain may actually register holding the whole family hostage (by refusing to do whatever, and thereby delaying everyone) as giving him a distorted sense of importance. It’s even better if family members become upset. Now he’s even controlling how they act! He’s center-stage as he proves that, again and again, he can turn a whole house upside down. And every time he’s allowed to do that, he further entrenches a brain map that reinforces he’s the boss.
3) Kids take control when they don’t trust those in charge to lead. If that’s so, then a key question to ponder is . . . how did those kids lose that trust in the first place?
Some variables that affect trust are: 1) As parents, we second-guess many of our decision; 2) We’re inconsistent with how we respond; 3) We focus more on the negative, without honoring the present gifts our child has to share; 4) We don’t regularly build into the structure to make it easy to comply.”2
Consider How River View Christian Academy Helps Struggling Girls
River View is a private boarding school on 45 beautiful acres located near Austin, Texas. Our purpose is to provide a safe, structured, and supportive setting for our teen girl students 13-17 years old.
Created as a safe, structured environment for struggling students, our 45-acre campus (east of Austin, TX) offers teen girls (ages 13-17) their best opportunity to focus on education, avoid negative distractions and improve their thoughts and behavior for good.
At River View, we help struggling teen girls embrace a healthy outlook on life and teach them how to make good personal choices. Rather than telling them or pressuring them to act a certain way, we show students through loving redirection how to make right choices on their own. This learned skill can help them make better decisions as adults and take ownership of their actions and choices now.
River View provides 24-hour care and supervision, with strong structure, mentoring, and boundaries. Students are responsible for garden and animal chores, in addition to school and homework. Of course, there are fun school activities, as well as the amazing national parks in the area.
Give us a call to see how we can help your young teen girl who struggles with Power and Control issues: 1-800-494-2200